Vague Loss and Incomplete Narratives of Abduction in Kosovo – A Review of the Article by Kajtazi-Testa and Hover

This article examines the narratives that exist among the families of missing persons in Kosovo. Narrative is a tool that allows people to make sense of their life experiences. When a narrative has a beginning, middle, and end, when the narrative is coherent and complete, it can be used. However, in cases where the end of the story is unknown – as in cases of abduction and disappearance, a narrative is created that is partial, blurred, or full of internal contradictions. The present article seeks to examine the psychological and behavioral effects of such narratives.

In the late 1990s, during the war in Kosovo, thousands of men were reported missing, and the fate of many of them remains unknown. Enforced disappearance is a common tool of political repression, and it is usually accompanied by institutional denial and silence. Those responsible for abduction or disappearance in such circumstances usually escape without paying for their actions, and many of them continue to live ordinary lives. This situation leaves the families helpless. In addition, without information about the fate of the missing loved one (even in cases where they were declared dead, there is usually no information about their last moments) – the narrative remains incomplete, but consists of fragments of events that cannot be connected into a coherent story. In such a situation, families are left in an endless cycle of doubts, imagined scenarios and question marks.

Family members of missing people experience a vague loss, which is characterized by a state of frozen mourning – since there is no certainty about the fate of the missing person, it is not possible to complete the mourning process for their loss. The absence of a grave sometimes creates false hopes, making it difficult for families to accept the absence of their loved one. The authors suggest that in order to enable healing, intellectual acceptance of the loss is required. To achieve this, a logical narrative must be developed that captures the sequence of events, and manages to provide answers to the family’s burning questions.

The study described in the article examines the psychological and behavioral effects of coping with a vague loss among mothers of missing persons in Kosovo. Through a series of interviews, the researchers sought to outline the narratives held by the mothers and describe their distress. The interviews revealed that most of the mothers were present when their family members were taken. They described being afraid to intervene during the abduction, fearing that any intervention would harm their children. All of the mothers reported acute psychological distress. They experienced uncertainty and duality about the fate of their missing loved one. They reported difficulty grieving for their loved ones – some described continuing to engage in daily life without coming to terms with the loss, and some described never-ending grief responses that did not subside over time. Some reported suicidal thoughts as a result. In contrast, among women who received proof of their loved ones’ fate, certainty had a certain reassuring quality. When there is a grave, mourning becomes a ritual bounded by time and place, rather than a cloud that consumes all time and all forces.

Another striking feature that emerged from the interviews is a lack of trust in the authorities in Kosovo. The mothers reported that, in their opinion, even 13 years after the disappearance, justice has still not been done. They felt that the authorities did not prioritize the identification of the missing, and they perceived the representatives of the authorities as ineffective and even impersonal. Despite this, they did not express hatred or a desire for revenge.

In conclusion, the authors argue that the evidence emerging from the current study is the forgotten consequences of political and ethnic conflicts. While there is a tendency to intellectualize such tragedies, treating them as “collateral damage” or an inevitable consequence of war, we must courageously view them as a heavy human cost, which has psychological, behavioral, and social impacts.